What do you say?
I know I don't usually talk about things that matter on my blog so I thought I would give it a try, you know, just to do something different.
Today I sent out a sympathy card to a high school boyfriend because I just found out that his mother past away. While looking through the card selection at Walgreens, I had a hard time finding a card that didn't mention God or have a scripture quote. The reason I was looking for one is because I know that he is not just non-christian but anti-christian. I didn't want to seem like I was exploiting the opportunity to mention prayer and God because that certainly was not my intention. Even after all of that looking, in the card I wrote that we are praying for him and his family (just because he doesn't believe that it will do anything doesn't mean we aren't praying).
It is hard enough to find something comforting to say to someone that has hope of seeing loved ones again in Heaven but what do you say to someone with no hope? I honestly don't know how I would have gotten through my father's death (and I am still going through it) without that hope and comfort from God.
The card has already been sent but I want to know if any of you have gone through anything like this. Have you ever had to congratulate or console someone that doesn't believe and if so, what did you say? I felt like mine sounded so lame.
posted by Mrs. Andrea Wood @ 6/28/2006 11:43:00 AM
7 Comments:
the only time I have had to write a sympathy card like that was when Seth's "great grandparents" died within 3 days of each other and I think it's more the fact that the card is being sent than what it says... I mean, you can't just say "hey what's up, sorry you lost someone...", but I doubt that, in a situation like that, someone will say "that's the lamest card I've ever seen" you know? I think you wrote the right thing ♥
Thanks. I hope that is what is understood.
you rock andrea . . . no matter what you write, you are always the most encouraging! i know this because i was your journal friend . . .
mostly, i guess just say you are there for them and love them and maybe even you can say that you, in some way, actually know how they feel and are feeling it for them . . . let them know they are not alone.
those are rough times. sometimes there are no words . . . only your presence.
love you!
Even though they don't believe, doesn't mean that you have to put your faith and hope to the side.
As Christians, we pray for each other. Also as Christians, we pray for those who are not. In the end, we never know what are prayers may do for another person!
I say keep it up. There's no harm in sharing the truth! Even though we view cards as very small gestures in the overall scheme, you never know what kind of impact it will have.
The fact that you were trying to be sensitive to your friend and struggled with doing the right thing, indicates that you probably found the right balance (authentic to your faith, but not preachy).
Perhaps his views will soften, due in part to your approach. Often we forget that it's God's job to change hearts. We just do what we can to be there when He can use us to help! I will pray for your friend and his family.
Thanks to you all! I feel better about this.
Actually I feel a little silly that I worried about it.
I just hope that his family is doing alright.
It's a testimony to your caring, sweet character that you worry so much about such things. Thanks for helping me to actually think about other people's feelings.
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